very odd

Grey Gardens with Jessica Lange and Drew Barrymore - a very strange story- weirdly compelling

I've been thinkin'

I used to work with a fellow who teased me when I opened a conversation with the works - I've been thinkin'... My brain is full these days and I am thinking about:

• exclusion and girls and social networking
• keeping connected with my son
  
• getting fit
• maintaining more control over my schedule at work -
  
• how to be more creative
• supporting good friends who have embarked on a crazy 4 year journey
  
• living with one vehicle
• eating less meat
  
• more disciplined prayer life
• saving money - spending less
• baking another crisp - need to find some blackberries
• using my sewing machine
  
• decluttering again -
  
• finding someone who can reupholster furniture
• taking more risks
• read more
• write more
• listen more
• talk less
• get enough sleep
  
• drink more water
  and
• finish those passport applications this weekend!
  

six things on a Friday

1. last day of swimming lessons for my son - his papa is taking him out for breakfast to celebrate
2. no big social plans tonight = it will be one last summer night on the deck
3. found a great deal on a Nikon D60 - a good entry level DSLR - will make a decision today
4. peanut butter and toast w/ my americano - the old standby
5. since I cut my hair short again - I have been wanting to wear earrings - finally managed to get a pair in - it has been years
   
6. and saving the best for last - I dragged my sorry self out of bed early enough to work out this morning. time to face the music. get busy. do something. this is / will be a battle for the next little while until I re-establish a habit - but I am committed.
   

tough going

We have hit a big of a rough patch here. My daughter is very sad - it appears she is being excluded from a group of girls she spend the majority of grade 8 days with. Not sure if it is the natural progression of friendship or something more deliberate - regardless it is very difficult to watch her experience the loss. She is sad beyond belief and feels quite alone. It doesn't help that her twin brother has become mr. social this summer. He has friends coming and going at all hours. Which brings its own challenges. I am not absolutely thrilled with all of his new friends.

We are listening to our daughter - she needs a safe place to talk - and yet, we want to communicate that high school is not her only social sphere. But, she doesn't really want to hear that right now. So, mostly we just listen.

I feel like I am flying by the seat of my pants in the parenting department.

run Forest run!

1st TD of the season
they came in 2nd in the tournament
a good opportunity to adjust to playing as a team
they have a strong offensive line this year
it is going to be a fantastic season.

gone before the photo

made this berry crisp posted by Stephanie

first game of the season

Today we officially start the beginning of football season.
A mini-tournament to give the boys an opportunity to face an opponent.
The weather looks just fine.
Friends and family to watch and cheer.
Dinner with my little sister and friend tonight.
Fresh Salsa and Chips
Thai salad
Chicken
Should be a good day.

reality

I am enjoying the quiet morning. I woke to more sunshine than I currently see now. I am feeling sad. I am sad because my vacation/ holiday will soon be over and I will be back at work next week. I am sad that I will be apart from my family. I loved being home during the day and being a part of their day lives. I don't want to give the impression that I do not like my job - I do and I am very fortunate to work with people I like. So, it is not that. I am sad to lose the freedom. And yet, when I think of others on this planet and what freedom means to them I chide myself for such pitiful thoughts. Because, truly I have freedom. I need to focus on being thankful for what I have and spend less time longing for something else.

I have a 14 year old daughter. She is a dancer. She is intense and hardcore. She is struggling. She needs to dance. Dancing is a way for her to process what is happening in her life. What we learned this summer is that 2 months with no structured daily dancing is not a good thing. It is too much of a break. She wept in my arms last night as she struggles to come to grips with ebb and flow of highschool relationships. My heart aches for her - I listen and gently remind her that she will make new friends and have new experiences and they will be good. I do not sugar coat life and tell her she will never be sad and never suffer loss. Because, that would be false. My own heart has been pierced and it is painful and you think you just want to go to sleep and not deal. But, the sun will rise and she can go forward and she is not alone.

None of us are alone on the journey.

six things on a Friday

1. cooler temperatures - I am slowly seeing the transition into another season and to be frank I am OK with that. I am looking forward to buying some new tights, bringing out old favourite sweaters, football season and dance classes.
   
2. Twinings Earl Grey tea - I have rediscovered my love for a cup of tea. With milk.
   
3. We are making homemade pizza tonight. I will make a "margarita" - fresh tomatoes, spinach and mozzarella.
4. the fall fashion magazine issues should be out - I buy these every year because I get the best value for my money. This is the only time I buy Vogue. It is a doorstop.
5. I am learning to use my husband's Leica rangefinder - we threw in some colour film and I am experimenting with depth of field.
6. planning a trip to the local fair - it opens tomorrow but we are busy all weekend and I am back to work on Tuesday so it looks like it will be a night time adventure.

my day

I liked Molly's idea of a recap.
Here is my day:

Woke to alarm; woke son for swimming lessons.
Made americano.
Drove to lessons with new novel "My soul to take" in hand.
Read novel for 45 minutes while waiting for son.
Took son to Tim Horton's drive thru for breakfast of champions.
Let dog off leash in preparation for walk.
Spent 20 minutes looking/ searching for AWOL dog - dog gets put in fenced section of yard and we skip the off leash walk.
Borrowed the power washer and spend the next 3 hours assisting husband and son bust off the grime.
Rested and read some more of the novel.
Drive to other side of town to pick up daughter.
Make quick dinner.
Drive son to football practice.
Pick up ice cream and strawberries to make milkshakes.
Finish novel.
Blog.

Still to come:
Pick up son from football practice.
Make a cappuccino milkshake for me - Mr. W and son will drink strawberry shakes.
Watch the final 4 episodes of season 3 of Friday Night Lights.
Bed.

A full day.

rushing around

stroke improvement class for my son
early
shock to the system
has anyone seen the swim goggles

random bits

My good friend Victoria took this photo. We had a celebratory dinner in honour of her husband who is going back to school - MED SCHOOL. He starts a week before anyone else. We had homemade burgers, greek salad and Chocolate Spice Bundt Cake. We ended the evening with a big round of Apples to Apples.

We are off to Bard on the Beach again - this time we shall see Othello. We are bringing our children. It is a strong cast and we are all looking forward to the play. We are also spending the day in the city - doing a bit of school shopping - some new shoes and funky accesories are on the list.

The heat wave is back. We will shut down the house and draw the blinds before we leave - the tent is sitting casually in the corner - just in case.

We have harvested our first two tomatoes - maybe by Thursday we will have enough to make grilled ham and tomato sandwiches.

I finished The Scarecrow by Michael Connelly and next on my list is The Book of Negroes by Lawrence Hill.

Happy Tuesday

heart to heart

I cried at my physiotherapist's appointment today.

Nothing traumatic or earth shifting happened

but

I had sort of fallen off the wagon

and

stopped doing my daily stretches

and

I

have disc problems

problems that

recur

and

will remain with me the rest of my life.

She told me nothing new

nothing I don't already know

I am going to be 45 in December and I need to be strong.

Why do I not do the things I know I need to do?

welcome back mr. sun

Hello Mr. Sun,
I am glad you decided to appear once more. I have one more week of holidays and I was hoping for some typical summer weather. I was not quite ready to say goodbye. As much as I enjoy the autumn season I really feel that I needed to sit in your glory a few more days.

We have good friends coming for dinner and we shall enjoy and expect your presence this afternoon.

Best Regards,
RW

transport

Now, that we have scrapped the Honda - we have to think about another vehicle. I would love to just have one vehicle but, that is just not feasible considering where we live and where Mr. W works and all the extracurricular activities. So, yesterday we started to look at vehicles.

We started with the Volkswagon and ended up at Honda. We still have to check out Toyota and Nissan. It is a lot of work and it is depressing to think of having a car payment - I miss my old Honda.

I know that I am one fortunate person and I should not be complaining but I am just so no into vehicles - the whole experience is unpleasant.

Off to find some goodness.

enough news -

My usual routine in the am is to mosey downstairs and plug the kettle in and turn on the radio. I hear the news and listen to the banter. But, today I shut it off. I made my americano and I decided that for the remainder of my time off - I will keep the radio off. I am listening to Allegri Miserere by the Tallis Scholars and it is beautiful.

I shall alter my universe. Make a tiny adjustment. Already I feel more at peace. It is still raining. Well it stopped for a short while - long enough for the boys to practice - sometime through the night it started raining again.

I think I will bake some chocolate chip cookies.

I will also finish hemming the new curtains for my daughter's room. And perhaps actually begin sewing a hoodie that my son designed. We are using a pattern but we are colour blocking - so one sleeve is green - the other white - one side is green the other white. We started it in the winter and then we got busy and never finished it.

I am also hoping to make myself a pair of wrist warmers. But, I need some needles to knit on the round. Maybe we will check out value village or the local thrift shop today. We have some stuff to drop off so that might be a good thing to do.

I have been slowly organizing my kitchen cupboards and this makes me very happy. I have two cupboards with glass doors - so really my pottery and dishes should kept there - instead we have our sushi making supplies and our canned soups in full view.

lightening strikes

I am about half way through my vacation/ holiday/ break. It has been good. The first week was a catch up week. Learning to sleep past 5.30am - or at the very least rolling over and going back to sleep and not feeling guilty. Errands done. We are working on letting go of the huge financial hiccup of a car repair bill that put a huge dent in our summer time plans. To salve our wounds we are committing to taking H and L to Maui during spring break. It is a an opportunity that probably will not come around again and so we are working to make it happen - which means staying put for the remainder of the summer. And honestly that is just fine with me.

I love my house and my yard and I enjoy spending time here at home. Waking up and sitting in the sun room in the quiet of the morn. Whether it rains or the sun shines - it is a good place to be.

I have been focusing on being grateful for all the good things. Forcing myself to look for goodness and finding it in unexpected places. Hanging out with my children. Laughing. Walking with my husband. Baking brownies. Watching Friday Night Lights together. Seeing my garden grow and eating cherry tomatoes off the vine.

We are anticipating another big storm - complete with thunder and rain showers. Football practice tonight. A friend is coming over to cut my daughter's hair. Doctor's appointment for my son and I shall finish the passport applications. We had our photos taken yesterday - and let me tell you they are some fantastic mug shots.

I am drinking hot chocolate and thinking about finding some wool socks for my feet.

glorious goldies

One of the good things about cooler weather is that I have cracked open the cookbooks and I am baking again. The Greystone Bakery Cookbook is my favourite dessert resource. They have a fantastic poppyseed cake with cream cheese icing that is well loved in this family. Yesterday I made Glorious Goldies - a "blond brownie" - similar to choc chip cookies but in bar form. We ate them with Ice Milk. Yum.

I have googled Greystone Bakery and lo and behold they have a blog and a big Internet presence - check them out.

harsh reality

So, the last 24 hours have been rather traumatic. My son was present at a party which ended tragically - one of the girls in his grade was hit by an automobile - and is in hospital with serious injuries - we are praying that she pulls through these critical hours and recovers.

It is not my story to tell here. But, the impact is great and wide. The ramifications are far reaching. We have been talking of making good and wise choices. It is hard to see my children struggle to understand and process what has happened. Everything gets put to the side and we just talk and talk. Which is just what needs to happen. I am glad that I am home now so I am available when they want to talk. For that I am thankful.

Brutal.

deliberations

The QB and the Running Back are in discussion.

haunting

found at Paideia

weather change

This is the first year we have been able to grow Hungarian peppers. Usually we don't have enough heat through the summer but thanks to the small heat wave that rolled through last week our plant is thriving.

But, we have moved to typical west coast weather system - the grey sky. I knew this would happen. Where has the sun gone? We don't need record breaking heat wave temperatures - but it would be nice if the sun would still shine. Is that too much to ask?

meryl streep is julia child

I thoroughly enjoyed the movie Julie & Julia.
I laughed and I cried.
Meryl Streep as Julia Child is perfect.

essential ingredients

a cooler day and so we will eat some prawns vindaloo tonight.
football practice
lunch with a friend
a stop at the art supply store
and the stationary shop


****
can someone help?
my flickr images med landscape size do not import correctly - I can't figure out how to correct

today

• trying out a new hair salon - complimentary "cut" with hair colour - I am getting more of a trim so I am not particularly nervous
• Bard on the Beach tonight - we are going to see "All's well that ends well"
• overcast skies
• ballet camp - I am loving watching my daughter dance - she has been off for a month and she is such a JOY to watch
• inspired by this bag
• drop off books at the library and hopefully pick up something new
• order new books

the honda is no more

I think this past winter was just too much for my Honda.
She never fully recovered.
We drove her to the Scrap-it depot.

She will be recycled.

In other news - the Subaru has been returned to us.

It is much cooler 20 degrees with some overcast skies. I am about to take down the tent as we hear rain is coming.

uncanny resemblance

my son

Peter

Peter

Is this my son or Peter Tork from the Monkees -
My son doesn't yet have the side burns but my husband and my priest had a good chuckle when they recognized the similarities.

the second day

Still reveling in the fact that the days stretch before me.
We have food.
and more moderate temperatures
we have found
a
free
old, oak teachers desk.
I will see some good friends today.
Liturgy
and
the bread of life.
Goodness.

the list

For the last 2 weeks I have been saying "when I am on holidays...."
Now I am on holidays and I have a list of things I want to do. I KNOW that I will not do them all but I am getting forgetful and so I am going to write them here - not to overwhelm myself but to just throw out all the possibilities. The first few things items are just things "that gotta get done", and it is easier to do them when both adults are home at the same time. Well not the buying of food but - that is a priority - especially in my son's eyes.

1. buy some real food - see previous post
2. pick up the subaru
3. scrap the honda
4. watch my daughter dance
5. take photos
6. tweak my blog - need to figure out how to post a complete photo - not one that gets cut off
   
7. eat fish and chips on the beach
8. stay up past 10.30 @ night
   
9. read
10. draw
11. sleep
12. menu planning - try something new a couple of times a week
13. go camping
    
14. de-clutter - the first week only
    
15. plant some spinach for the fall
16. walk every day
17. write every day
18. read
    
19. watch my son play football*
    
20. hair cut
21. buy sept issue of magazines - always the best value
    
22. have friends over for dinner on my new deck
23. hang out with my daughter
24. see Julie & Julia
25. see Harry Potter
26. maybe watch some FNL
27. read
28. conversations with my husband - dreaming of the future
29. learn how to use photoshop - well begin at least
30. make ice-cream
31. sew a bit
32. actively look for goodness in each and every day

*did you think my post about football was about my son's team... some of you did - I went to a BC Lions game - pro football - but was less than impressed.