Friday, December 02, 2011

day 2 #reverb11

My children will do it differently -- If you could choose one thing that your children will do or experience in a different way than you have, what would it be and why?*

The world is considerably smaller for my 16 year old twins.  The amount of information that they can access and is available to them is exponentially higher than when I was 16.   This is both good and bad.

I am envious of the opportunities available to them - the technology - the knowledge - the ability to communicate with others in far off places in real time.  But, I  also have the maturity and wisdom to understand there are implications.   We constantly talk about online activity.   What you put out on the internet stays on the internet.  Facebook is brutal.  I sound like a broken record.  So many teachable moments.  And so, ultimately I do not envy them.  I would not want to be a teenager now.

They communicate on their own wavelength.  It is hard to break in.  Cell phones and texting and facebook have created a middle layer where the parents are observers.  You skulk around facebook looking for clues.  You hope they are making good choices.  You offer opportunities to talk and ask open ended questions.  You do not let your facial expression betray you when they do share.  You listen and shut up.

I am hopeful the good will outweigh the bad.  I am hopeful that they recognize the opportunities to see and explore the world and connect to others.  I hope that they can find the balance between sharing too much and just enough.  I embrace the moments they still come to me to ask my opinion.  I am humbled.

*not sure whose prompt this is... if you can help me track it down, I'd be grateful


Lil'M said...

even when I was 16 the world was so much different. cannot say it would be easy to be an adolescent right now... but then, it's not easy being one anytime.
by the sounds of things, they have been given the tools and resources to start standing on their own two feet and you have mentioned before that, in grace, you will have to step back and let them make their own choices and decisions - both the good ones and the bad ones.
my mom had a hard time letting go of us - she still does - but i think it gives her comfort to know that despite the constantly shifting ground on which we stand, we still keep our feet (more or less!) and are not afraid to go back to her to 'kiss our bruises' when we do fall down.

Victoria said...

this is a good prompt. and I echo your words, I do not envy them being 16 now.

deb colarossi said...

There is a lot of wisdom in this post.

Blog Archive